The Life After
by Mara Williams
Summary: Ever wonder what happened after that Saturday detention?
1. Confusion

I love The Breakfast Club; it's one of my favorite movies. This is about what happens after that Saturday in detention.  
  
  
  
Chapter One: Confusion  
  
  
  
Sunday, March 25 1984  
  
John Bender sat in his room, strumming on his guitar. His radio was playing dimly in the background. He had a British flag hanging above his door, and various British punk band posters tacked to his walls. The carpet he sat on was a brown-grey. There were various stains here and there, stains probably older than he was. The slam of a door let Bender know that his father was home. He put down his guitar and cursed. All he needed right now was his father's bitching. He knew his father was drunk and probably high. He always was after an afternoon at Stud's Pub. Bender's thoughts turned to his mother. She was probably in for another beating. His father always had violent intentions when he was drunk.  
  
His mother was probably sitting in her room, crying. When Bender had gotten home from Saturday detention yesterday, his mother was sitting on the kitchen floor. Lorelai Bender had her back against the olive green cabinets, her legs strewn out over the brown linoleum in front of her. Her mascara was running in huge globs down her face, her eyes were red and puffy. Her dark brown hair was matted and falling out of the messy bun at the back of her head.  
  
"Got detention again next week, good-for-nothing boy?" Lorelai sniffed, and wiped the smeared makeup off her face with a ratty dishtowel.  
  
"Yeah, ma. What's it to you? It's not like you actually care about what I do." Bender started for the stairs. His mother never failed to lecture him about his laziness. All you had to do was look at the house to know she didn't do much, either.  
  
"Maybe if you got off your lazy ass I would start to care. Your father and I try to give you the very best, and what do we get for it? We get calls from your vice principal, what's his name? Vernon. He probably thinks we're good-for-nothing parents." Lorelai gave a humorless smile as she watched her son retreat. She liked using that term, good-for-nothing.  
  
Bender was still unsure about the previous day. The detention was weirder than any he'd ever been to. Andy, Brian, Claire, and Allison had seen that John Bender was actually a person, not just an empty shell of rebellion. Bender wasn't quite sure of how he felt about that yet.  
  
What Bender really couldn't figure out was how he felt about Claire. Claire, the poor little rich girl, was conceited. Claire had never had to work for anything. All she had to do was snap her fingers and she got what she wanted. But before she had stepped into her father's BMW at the end of the day, she had placed a diamond earring in Bender's gloved hand. No one had ever given Bender anything, besides violence and cigarettes.  
  
Bender had never really liked any girl before. As he told Claire yesterday, he "considered" girls. But Claire was different. Despite her conceitedness, despite her money, despite her stature at Shermer High, Bender liked her. Claire was different. 


	2. Images

These chapters are short, but I'm only using one person per chapter.  
  
  
  
Chapter 2: Images  
  
  
  
Claire got out of her father's BMW and pressed the button to close the garage door. Her father had dragged her off to church, again. Claire had always thought that it was good to make appearances at church, on the social scale. You always needed to make a good impression. Claire cursed herself. There went her superficiality, again. Bender and all the rest had opened her eyes yesterday. She realized now that she was not the only person in the world.  
  
Before, Claire had always thought of herself. Even up until yesterday afternoon, only her feelings and life mattered to her. Her mother and father only cared about themselves. No one cared for her. Why shouldn't she be concerned about herself?  
  
"Stop it!" Claire thought to herself. She was starting over. Detention yesterday showed her that people just like her are out there. She cared about her reputation, yes. But now, she was taking a stand. She was going to stand up to her friends. She wasn't going to take their shit any longer.  
  
Claire just hoped she could stay true to this revelation. She wanted to be more like Bender. He didn't care what people thought of him. He did what he wanted, when he wanted. Claire thought of him calling Vernon "Dick". It had been hard for her to hold the laughs in. Claire loved that he said what he thought. He'd probably have no problem standing up to his friends.  
  
What would happen tomorrow, though? Would he stand up to his friends and actually admit to liking Claire? Or did he even like Claire at all?  
  
Claire was pretty sure he did. That kiss yesterday had been amazing. It was one of the best kisses Claire had ever gotten. There was something about Bender that was so attractive. Perhaps it was the hair that fell across his face, obscuring the view from his eyes. He had puppy-dog eyes. Claire chuckled to herself. Bender would not like being compared to a puppy dog. He had a major image thing going on.  
  
But then again, so did everyone else. Andy had the same problem Claire did, sticking true to their friends' image. Brian had to maintain the image of being a brain. Allison was the weirdo.  
  
Sure, that was what they were on the outside. Claire had learned a major lesson yesterday, though. Not everyone really is what he or she appears to be. Everyone has a little bit of the princess, criminal, jock, brain, and basket case inside of them.  
  
Claire walked up the stairs and into her room. She flopped back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She was nervous about going back to school tomorrow. Yesterday afternoon, Brian had asked what was going to happen on Monday. Claire had answered. But even she was not sure that was the right answer. What was going to happen? 


	3. Prelude to a Secret

Chapter 3: Prelude to a Secret  
  
  
  
Monday, March 26 1984  
  
Brian's mother pulled up to the front door of Shermer High.  
  
"No more trouble, you hear me, mister? You better do well on your trig test, or no physics club for a month!" Brian got out of the aged station wagon and pulled his heavy backpack from the car. His mother was constantly threatening him about his grades. They didn't have enough money to put him through college, so his parents were counting on his getting a scholarship. Plus, Brian's mother always had to look good for her church friends.  
  
Brian's mother was the type of parent who'd say good things about her son to make her look good in front of her friends. It made her seem the "good mother". Then, when they were away from the crowds, Brian would get ridiculed on how he was never good enough. It was always something with his mother. His socks didn't match. He didn't get an A plus in Chemistry. He talked too much. He talked too little. It was a good thing she didn't know about his grade in shop yet.  
  
Brian stood on the curb and watched as the station wagon screeched away. He was glad for school. He didn't have to deal with his mother for seven hours straight. It was seven hours of peace.  
  
Brian took back that thought. School was hardly peaceful now. He hoped it wouldn't get around that the destroyed locker in the hallway was his, and why it was destroyed. All he needed was people coming up to him and asking him questions. Still, at least they would notice him. No one had ever noticed him before. Sure, he had his friends. Larry Lester was a good friend. He had his friends in the academic clubs. He had his friends from detention.  
  
Brian brought himself back to reality and looked towards the school. He faced a challenge today. He didn't know what was going to happen. The past Saturday in detention had changed him. It had changed the people he had shared it with. How would they deal with it today, though?  
  
The first three class periods passed very slowly. Usually Brian could pay attention in class. Today, though, he just couldn't focus. The lunch bell finally rang after what seemed hours.  
  
Brian walked into the cafeteria and searched for a place to sit. Most of the tables were filled. Brian walked by each table, looking hopefully at the occupants. He got a simple shake of the head, a cold shoulder, or a rebuff. Brian finally found an empty group of chairs at the end of a table. He sat down and opened his lunch box.  
  
"I really should get my mom to give me paper bags," he muttered to himself. He pulled out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and opened a Star Wars book.  
  
"Can I sit here?" Brian looked up from his book to see Claire standing over him.  
  
"Uh—uh, sure." He moved his backpack and textbooks to make room on the table. He was slightly puzzled; he thought for sure that when Claire had told him things would be just like before she was telling the truth. He thought she'd still give in to the pressures of the "in crowd".  
  
"So, how is everything? I had a test in 2nd today, I'm pretty sure I failed it." Claire pulled a black container and some chopsticks out of her purse.  
  
"Sushi again?" Brian asked.  
  
"Yeah, want to try some?" Claire held a California roll between her chopsticks.  
  
"Uhh, no thanks. The thought of eating raw fish just isn't appealing." Brian had never been a fan of sushi. "So, you're finally standing up to your friends, huh?" Brian pulled a canister of applesauce out of his lunchbox and peeled back the top.  
  
"Yeah. Proud?" Claire, to Brian's surprise, didn't seem nervous at all. She seemed relaxed, even more relaxed than she was around her friends.  
  
"I am. The fact that you're hanging out with me isn't exactly their idea of what you should be doing, is it?"  
  
"No, it's not. But you know what? I don't care. They're not exactly great friends, if you know what I mean. Friends know your secrets. I don't trust them with mine. Brian, can you keep a secret?"  
  
"Sure. What is it?"  
  
Brian and Claire were interrupted.  
  
"Hi." Allison meekly sat down next to Claire. 


	4. Meaningful Insights

Chapter 3--Meaningful Insights  
  
Claire looked up from her lunch. She was pushing what remained of her sushi around the little black container with her chopsticks. It reminded Allison of the swirling sky in Van Gogh's "Starry Night". Allison knew she was intruding on something. Still, these were her new friends. She never had friends before, and she wanted to make the best of it.  
  
It had surprised Allison that Claire was actually sitting with Brian, much less eating with him. It means a lot if a girl eats with you. That means she's on the person's level, is willing to be friends, and, most of all, it means that she's comfortable around that person.  
  
Allison knew Claire was deep. It had showed that day in detention. Allison observed everyone the first few hours that Saturday, and Claire had the overall appearance of a nice but shallow in-crowder. Then, later, Claire had showed her attraction to Bender. She had been nice to Brian, and later, Allison. Allison was a good judge of character and knew that Claire was more than she seemed. But then, so was everyone else who had become Allison's friend on that day. Now, she was eating, and conversing, deeply, with Brian, and it surprised Allison. It shouldn't have, but it did. Allison thought Claire would fall subject to her friend's orders. But the gentle Claire had shown herself to be a lion.  
  
"Hi, Allison," Brian said, and indicated the chair next to his. He pulled Saltines out of his lunchbox and started munching.  
  
"Would you like the rest of this, Allison? I'm not very hungry anymore," Claire said. She pushed the container towards Allison. Allison eyed it doubtfully.  
  
"If you like a Cap'n Crunch-pixie-stick-with mayo on white, I assure you, you'll enjoy sushi." Claire laughed and passed over the chopsticks.  
  
Allison ungracefully dropped the sushi roll numerous times before finally getting it to reach her mouth. She tried it, and was surprised that it was actually quite good.  
  
"So, what are ya'll doing after school?" Brian asked, finishing the last of his Saltines.  
  
"Nothing!" Allison said. Wow, that was a bit strong, she thought. "That is, I don't think I'm doing anything."  
  
"Great!" Brian picked closed his lunch box and picked up his books. "you guys want to come over to my house?"  
  
Cliffhanger! I like the way this story's going, I think I'll continue... 


	5. Anger and Lust

To one of my reviewers: Thank you for telling me about the facts I didn't get quite straight. I like how you actually gave me constructive criticism. Thanks! I would like to say, though, that Bender and Claire did kiss in the last five minutes of the movie. I am positive of this because I remember thinking that it was weird how the jock ended up with the weirdo, the rebel with the princess, etc...I also knew that Brian had a paper bag, I just simply felt like putting lunch box. I manipulated the original story, and I'm sorry, but I couldn't resist.  
  
Chapter 5: Anger and Lust  
  
Andy leaned against the mustard-colored wall in the back of the cafeteria. He didn't want to be at school. He didn't want to be anywhere. He had gotten into another argument with his father the night before. It was the same thing Andy had heard millions of times before. It had been about "blowing his ride". His father accepted what Andy had done, because "guys screw around", but schools didn't give scholarships to discipline cases. Andy had that sense of déjà vu, it was the same one-sided argument he had heard the day his father dropped him off for detention. Andy didn't even want to wrestle anymore.  
  
Wrestling had been the best thing in his life. It gave him the sense of release. His life was just so damn frustrating that he couldn't take it out anywhere. He had started wrestling in his sophomore year, and it had been the best times of his life. He could take out all his aggression. He didn't have to worry about shit like grades, girls, parents, coaches, and most of all, his home life. The thing Andy hated most about himself was that he dwelled on everything. He couldn't let things stay behind him. He thought about his worries, fears, and events gone wrong constantly. He carried off the attitude of a carefree guy, but inside, he was wound as tight as a coil.  
  
Andy distanced himself from his regular table. He didn't want his friends to see him. Earlier that morning, he had the intentions to hang out as usual with them. They got to talking, and Andy realized how unbelievably immature they were. They still seemed like freshmen, and they were juniors! He gave an excuse and left, and had been avoiding them the rest of the day.  
  
His friends were obsessed with sex; it was all they talked about. Andy, of course, was a guy, and he liked to talk about sex just as much as the next testosterone minded guy. But when it was all he could talk to his friends about, it got on his nerves. It got on his nerves more than just slightly. It made him want to punch the guys who talked daily about their conquests in bed. He especially didn't want to eat lunch with them, out of fear of indigestion. Andy swore he'd punch the next person who came up to him.  
  
Andy pushed off the wall and started to weave through the tables towards the doors. He felt a tap on his shoulder. His fists clenched. He hoped that the other person was one he liked, simply for their sake. 


	6. Consciousness and Chopsticks

This chapter's a little weird—I don't really like what I wrote for Bender but here it is…r/r  
  
  
  
Chapter 6—Consciousness and Chopsticks  
  
  
  
Bender stood outside the cafeteria. He chuckled to himself; it was the first time he was actually going to enter the establishment. He found the place insipidly boring, and disgusting as well. The most disgusting part was the fact that it was where the jocks, preps, etc. stuffed their faces. Then the girls would go straight to the bathroom and throw the food right up.  
  
Bender didn't quite know why he felt inclined to enter the cafeteria. He had just gotten the urge. Throughout his sixteen years, Bender had learned to follow his instincts.  
  
He gathered up his pride and walked through the double doors. All the tables were full-some with senior jocks and their slaves, some with giggling freshmen, and some with—  
  
Claire?  
  
Bender didn't quite know why, but he wasn't expecting to see Claire. And Claire was with—Brian?  
  
"Okay, this is definitely weird…"Bender muttered to himself. He started to walk out the doors. Whatever had pushed him to enter the cafeteria didn't matter. Screw instincts. He didn't want to deal with that situation.  
  
"Just like your father". What the hell was this, voices inside his head? "Running from your problems, just like your father."  
  
Bender shook his head. This was definitely weird. He never heard his conscious talking to him.  
  
"Perhaps you just chose to ignore it. She's changed you…"  
  
Bender ignored the voices and stomped out of the cafeteria.  
  
Claire watched him go. She couldn't get over his…sex appeal. Every time she saw him, her world froze. Everything around her moved in slow, swishing movements until they were gone. The only two people left in the world were Bender and herself. It was heaven. Claire wanted her life like that—quiet, golden, relaxed.  
  
"Claire? Claire? Having fun in space? Claire?" Brian shook Claire's shoulder.  
  
"Huh? Oh, sorry, Brian. Just spaced out for a minute there." Claire put her sushi box back in her bag.  
  
"You know, if you keep staring at John like that, people may begin to get suspicious." Brian closed his lunchbox. "I mean, it's not enough that you're sitting with me, you have to drool after Bender. Your friends will disown you forever."  
  
"Don't worry, Brian, I have no problem with that." Claire shifted in her seat.  
  
"What about when they crawl back to you, asking for forgiveness, Claire? What will you do then?" Brian didn't mean to get all worked up, but he didn't want to feel the pain of rejection, not again. "Look, I'm sorry. I just don't want you to…well…"  
  
"Don't worry, I'm not going to reject you." Claire gathered her things and rose from her chair. "C'mon, let's fly. I'm tired of this constant din."  
  
Brian sat for a minute, stunned. Claire had almost read his thoughts. He recovered and picked up his heavy book bag. He followed Claire out the back doors of the cafeteria, out into the courtyard. He didn't realize that he had left his lunchbox on the table.  
  
His fists clenched. He hoped that the other person was one he liked, simply for their sake. He swung around, tense, ready to "crack skulls". Briefly Andy wondered what Vernon think, hearing Andy use his favorite phrase.  
  
"What do you want?" he asked. Then he saw her.  
  
Allison stood in front of his, hunched over. She was back to wearing her black eyeliner and dark clothing. Her bag hung from her shoulder. A pair of chopsticks was held between her fingers.  
  
"Allison!" Andy said. "Uhh…what are you doing here? I…uh…"  
  
"I was eating. What else would I be doing here, sporto?" Allison looked hurt. Andy wondered what had happened. He certainly hadn't done anything—oh.  
  
"Allison, I'm sorry. I wasn't snapping at you. I just was thinking about, well, never mind." Andy shifted his weight from his right to his left foot and shoved his hands in his pockets.  
  
"I was just coming to ask you if you wanted to come to Brian's house with me Friday. Never mind now." Allison turned her back to him and hurried out of the cafeteria.  
  
"Andy, man, who was that?" Stubby, a fellow jock came up to Andy and buffeted him on the shoulder. What did she want, an autograph?" Stubby laughed to himself.  
  
"No one, Stubbs. Just a girl. A weird girl." Though his mind was screaming at him, Andy walked with Stubby to their regular table. 


	7. Confessions

Just a friendly disclaimer; I own none of these characters.  
  
  
  
Chapter 7: Confessions  
  
  
  
Allison was past tears now. All she felt was anger. The anger in her was so intense it hurt. She felt as if flames were burning, their point of origin in the deepest part of her body.  
  
It wasn't so much Andy's indifference that hurt her; it was the fact that the closeness they had shared was shattered. Allison felt that the bond between them was gone. She wondered briefly if it could ever exist again. She quickly rejected the thought. Andy deserved better than she was. He deserved someone who could…who could…  
  
She waited at the front of Shermer High for her ride. Her mother was supposed to be picking Allison up, but Allison had a feeling her mom would be late. Mary was late for everything.  
  
Allison couldn't even call her mother "Mom". Ever since Allison was a child, her mother had insisted upon being called Mary. Allison's mother was stuck in the sixties, her ideas radical, her arms bruised from the needles. Mary's addiction would kill her eventually. Allison accepted that as fact. The slap in the face had come years ago.  
  
Allison was in the seventh grade. It was a windy fall afternoon. Everything surrounding her was golden; the sky, the leaves, the sidewalks, the cars, the houses all had a bright aura vibrating from them. The waves permeated Allison; her life was perfect.  
  
Or so she thought. She walked through her front door to see her mother passed out in the foyer, a needle dangling from her arm. Her lips were tinged purple. Her skin was transparent. Allison ran to the phone and called for an ambulance.  
  
Mary's secret had finally emerged. What Allison thought was a perfect relationship with her mother was tarnished. Mary would never seem the same to Allison's eyes.  
  
That had been the first and last serious episode with her mother. Allison always had a fear that one day she would come home to find Mary…dead.  
  
Allison gave up waiting and waked towards her home.  
  
Don't think about Andy, she thought. Don't think about Mary.  
  
Allison was lost. She was in a tunnel with no beginning and no end. She was surrounded by darkness.  
  
  
  
Tuesday March 27, 1984  
  
Brian got out of his mother's car and shut the door. This morning's ride, thankfully, had passed in silence. Brian hadn't gotten yelled at, for once. He wished all his car rides could go like that.  
  
Behind that silence was a strict tension. Last night his mother had found out about the elephant. The elephant was shattered like Brian's mother's dreams for him. Brian had never felt like such a disappointment. Never once could he be perfect. Never once could he please anyone.  
  
If only the gun hadn't gone off…  
  
"Brian!" he heard a girl's voice call from behind. He couldn't figure out why a girl would be calling him. He didn't have anyone. He was alone…  
  
"Brian! Hello, Brian?" Claire ran from the sidewalk and tapped his shoulder. "What's wrong with you?" Claire was a bit worried; Brian was hunched, had a glazed look in his eyes. "Hey, listen. I need to talk to you. Remember the other day when I asked you if you could keep a secret?"  
  
Brian blinked and stared at Claire. He gruffly cleared his throat. "Yeah. Yeah, I can keep a secret." He wondered why Claire would tell him. She had her girlfriends. She wasn't talking to them at the moment, because she "hates going along with everything they say", but who was to say that she wouldn't be friends with them next week?  
  
"Ummm, can we go somewhere else?" Claire awkwardly raised her hands, and then dropped them, as if she had lost a battle.  
  
Brian wondered at that for a moment but followed after her down the sidewalk. She said as he came next to her, "I used to stay with my aunt for months at a time. She lived in that house right there." Claire pointed at a house three doors down from Brian. "When she died, well, I had no one." Claire led Brian off the sidewalk and into the shelter of the forest. "This was my special place." She went to sit on the base of an old, gnarly tree. "I would come here to think, read, listen to music, whatever. Sometimes my aunt would come with me.  
  
"Brian, I'm going to get to the point here. I was in eighth grade when my aunt died, and I had never felt so alone. She was my only friend. Believe it or not, I never fit in with the girls at that private school I went to, and well, I had to do something. I felt so empty, and lonely, and I had no way out. One day I came out here and I slit my wrist."  
  
Brian could only stare. The girl who appeared so confident, so cool, so collected, she had tried to take her life?  
  
Claire continued. "I'm telling you this because I'm not sure you won't try to commit suicide again. And I'm telling you this because I know I can trust you. It's been a secret that no one but my parents knows. I want you to know because I know what you're feeling.  
  
"I want you to come here whenever you feel alone, and just remember that I'll always talk to you. Just remember that there is always someone out there who will listen"  
  
With that, Claire turned and walked towards the sidewalk. Brian stared after her, then began to cry into his hands. 


	8. Old and New Friendships

Chapter 8—Old and New Friendships  
  
  
  
Andy pushed his way through the hallway. "Stupid freshmen," he thought. They were always in the way. And besides, they were immature and stupid and—  
  
Andy's thoughts paused as he saw her at the end of the corridor. He really had been too harsh. She was in her black clothing, walking hunched as if to block out the world. "If only I could do that," he thought.  
  
He admired Allison so much. She did what she wanted, damn the consequences. Well, maybe that wasn't her exact outlook. But when you got her started, she became as passionate as a bull with a bee sting. But, anyways, Allison was just…there. She existed but by herself and she was helpful and could say no. She had been the only one not to smoke the dope.  
  
When a rude senior pushed him out of the way Andy realized he had been standing in the middle of the hallway. He also realized Allison was gone.  
  
  
  
"So, I'm going to have this party at my house on Sunday," Brian was saying. "For just us, that is. It's not really a party, it's just—"  
  
"I get it, dweeb," Bender said good-naturedly. He had decided that Brian wasn't so bad after all. He was smart. He was a tad bit on the dorky side, but Bender could get over that.  
  
"What am I thinking?" Bender thought to himself. Two weeks ago I wouldn't have forgiven any dork for being dorky, and now here I am sitting next to him in Chem. The fact that I'm actually in Chem is a totally different thing. What's happened to me?"  
  
To Brian he said, "I'll have to check my schedule, you know, but maybe I'll crash."  
  
"Great! Claire said she'll come too. Allison is coming too. I don't know about Andy. He has been…distant."  
  
"Sporto can't get a date? With his macho muscles he can carry a girl to the party."  
  
Bender didn't really care about Andy. The prick had been nothing but an ass the whole detention, from the first minute. "Well maybe I did provoke him a little bit," Bender thought to himself. "Now what am I thinking?"  
  
  
  
Claire watched Bender and Brian from the courtyard. She couldn't believe it. From her view of the Chem classroom, she saw Bender sitting next to Brian, of all people, and actually talking to him. Then she saw Bender punch Brian's arm, like she had seen Andy do to Stubby and his friends. What was this? Bender being civil?  
  
"Maybe I should talk to him," she thought. "Geez, Claire, it's not like you've had trouble talking to a guy before. She had asked out her first boyfriend, the one who just wanted to get her in bed. But that was all over with now. Suddenly she couldn't wait for Brian's party.  
  
"So I asked the lady, 'What is this? You don't carry Yves St. Laurent perfume?' I was forced to buy Bennetton. Of all the cheap and low down things!" Claire's friend Steph sniffed and shrugged her shoulders.  
  
"Why didn't you just go to a different store?"  
  
"Claire! God, you know we don't shop anywhere else!" Steph said in a haughty tone. She pushed her curly blonde hair over her shoulder. She just couldn't figure out what was wrong with Claire lately. She had been downright rude, and she had been hanging out with that kid who had tried to kill himself. She had been sighing at every comment Steph had made. Well, that would not stand.  
  
"Claire, what is wrong with you? You have been such a bitch lately! And what are you doing hanging out with that kid who always wears the green sweatshirt? Oh, I know. He's doing your work for you? Is he tutoring you?"  
  
"No, Steph."  
  
"Then what? I know you don't have a crush on him. God, that would be violating a code of ethics, or something. C'mon, tell me! I'm your best friend!"  
  
"No, you're not, Steph. Have you ever thought that there is more to life than shopping and nail polish? You are so shallow! You know what? I'm tired of this! I'm tired of going along with everything you say! I'm not going to do this anymore. Goodbye Steph."  
  
With that, Claire turned and walked away. She felt relieved. She felt as if she were Atlas, her punishment over, the weight of the world finally lifted from her shoulders.  
  
  
  
"So you basically told her to shove it?" Brian asked. Truthfully, he was not as surprised as he thought he should have been. He had seen Claire distancing herself from her friends day by day. Andy, on the other hand, was a different story.  
  
"Yeah. To tell you the truth, I had never felt so relieved in my life." Claire gave a nervous laugh. "I never liked Steph anyways."  
  
"I'm glad you did it. This is a step forward for you." Brian spotted Bender walking to the parking lot with his friend Spike. "Bender said he might come to my party Saturday night."  
  
"Really? Good."  
  
"That's all you have to say? Good?" 


	9. Precedence

Chapter 9-Precedence  
  
Saturday, March 31, 1984; 12 p.m.  
  
"John Bender, where do you think you are going?" Lorelai Bender's hair was frizzy and unkempt, framing a face riddled with sweat. "Your father is not going to be very happy if you don't go out and cut that grass, right now! He's barely over your spilling that damn paint in the garage!" Bender continued his way to the door, stepping over the mangy cat lying in the middle of the kitchen floor. "Out." "Out? Out where? Your father asked you to cut the grass! If you don't cut it-" Bender turned around, looking down at his delicate mother. "What'll he do that he hasn't done before? Don't worry, he's not gonna take it out on you. It's much more enjoyable to him when he hits me. Besides, there's no grass to cut. It's all weeds. Even if I did cut it, the mower would get clogged. Too much dog shit out there." He opened the door, ignoring its groan of protest, and walked away from his mother. What he was really walking away from was responsibility, and he wasn't going to deny it. He had never cared for it. Responsibility made you have to stick with something. Commitment, that's what it brought. Commitment to something that you couldn't back out of if you got in too deep. Like his father. Too deep in a marriage, with a son he hated. Sometimes Bender wondered why his father had married his mother. The idea of love between them was.abominable. His father didn't love anything. He didn't love anything, that is, except for his "tooikey pot pies". Those and violence. Bender learned his lessons from his father. Commitment brought pain. Grab on to something and it will just slip from your fingers. Chase it and it will run away, faster than you can follow. You just had to let it be. What wise men the Beatles were.  
  
  
  
6:00 p.m.  
  
Claire looked in the mirror at herself. The girl staring back at her was a new person. She was wearing a pair of jeans, sneakers, and a shirt that said "Smokey's Diner". She had never looked like such a bum in her life. But for once she didn't care. Claire had resolved to concentrate on what she said to people, not her appearance. Claire looked out the window at a blue Corvette parked in the driveway. A belated birthday present from her father, she had been presented with it as a condolence. Or whatever her father thought she wanted. Claire wasn't ungrateful. It was an amazing machine. She left the shelter of her room and headed out into the hallway. That's what it was to her. Shelter. Shelter from decision, shelter from speaking her mind, shelter from things she didn't want to address. It was shelter.from herself. She was so afraid. Claire was afraid of her feelings, afraid of digging deeper. She would find something she liked, and then get hurt when it was taken away from her. That's what happened every time she started to get comfortable, every time she started to be happy. She flashed back to the innocent times, when nothing could happen to her. Her parents were happy in their marriage. There was laughter in the house. Her father sweeping her up in a big bear hug, her mother brushing the snarls from her hair in front of the vanity at night. Crisp fires burning in the cavernous fireplace, Nat King Cole playing on the radio. Christmas trees, presents, butlers. As she brought herself back to the present, Claire knew that she had those things now. During the holidays, her parents tried to make things normal. But there was one thing her parents couldn't fake anymore. It was the love.  
  
  
  
  
  
Andy paced back and forth in his room. Go, not go. It was standing on the precipice of life. He took the plunge; he actually started living his life, not just running from place to place. He knew that was how it was going to be. He knew because of what he had felt that Saturday. Andy had felt that he was existing, not just trying to impress and be cool. And there was Allison. She was so dependent on herself, yet searching for acceptance, for comfort, for belonging, for.love. Love. Was he in love with her? No way. He barely knew her. And yet. Maybe you didn't need to know someone to love them. Maybe you learned that later, and in the process you got to know them and while you're doing that you love them. Then again, maybe love didn't exist. He supposed he'd find out that evening when he faced her again.  
  
  
  
6:30 p.m.  
  
Brian checked his watch for the fourth time in two minutes as he paced back and forth in his room. The walls surrounding him were clean white, garnished only with a Star Wars poster and a humongous picture of Albert Einstein that read, "THINKING POWER IS THE ONLY SOLUTION!" His bed was immaculate, no wrinkles in the sheets, no pillow out of place. He still had half an hour to wait. He wasn't really that nervous. Well, yes, actually he was. He was nervous about how things would turn out. He still doubted if everyone would get along. It took almost eight hours for them to be able to stand each other the previous Saturday. No! He wouldn't think that way. His mother was always telling him not to focus on the negative. Not that he took her advice. Twenty-nine minutes to go.  
  
  
  
Allison thundered sown the stairs, her boots making muffled thumps on the carpet as she raced the banister to the floor. It was something she had done since she was six years old and she and her mother had moved into the two-bedroom house, a nice change from their previous residence in a trailer. "We are not trailer trash, Allison," Mary had said when they'd walked hand-in-hand into their new home. At that point in her life, Allison's mother was off the drugs, and trying to be positive. She had a steady job with good income. She had pulled herself and her daughter out of the slums and into decent civilization. Allison had loved the house from the start. She no longer felt as if she was trapped in a square foot of musty, bug-ridden filth. She learned everything about the house, imagining she was an explorer navigating underground tunnels in the Amazon. Sometimes the banister was a python, chasing her down through the temple, her lover Indiana Jones was at her side. Allison had been too young to know what a lover was, but it was a nice word to say when Mary wasn't paying attention. Allison's contentment hadn't lasted long. She walked out into the fresh air and banished all thoughts of her mother from her mind. Tonight was a night for her. Allison somehow knew that she could not be hurt tonight. She wouldn't let it happen. She knew there was a good soul in the depths of every person she had shared herself with that Saturday. 


End file.
